Friday, December 17, 2010
So I went to my first post op appointment yesterday and had my drain removed! I couldn’t be happier about that, however the stitches are still there. This part I was not so happy about, but the doctor said that everything is healing up nicely and that he wants to see me again for my next post op appointment in three weeks. That would be January 6 to be exact (2 days after my 24th birthday). What does this all mean? Well unfortunately for me it means that exercise is still going to be delayed.
This is the sixth time that I have had this same surgery done since I was 18 and I do not want to jeopardize the healing process in any kind of way, however I also am a little sad because this certainly makes meeting my own personal goals a lot harder. This couldn’t have come at a worse time, however if this is what it takes for me to get in tip top shape that’s what matters right? I mean what is the point if I’m not healthy because health is really the foundation to being in shape isn’t it?
I am trying to remain positive and will continue to do minimal exercise and watch what I’m eating. I’m not going to lie it has been tough just hanging around the house all day not being able to get out of bed most days and also reminding myself how much I don’t want to just pick something up that’s bad for me. That may be the easy route, but it isn’t the smart one. So I simply have to try to keep thinking in terms of my glass being half full and that this time will be the last time and that I can stop putting my life on pause and putting on a big fake smile that everything is OK. Everything has not been OK for me physically for a long time so I cross my fingers and pray that this time it will be.
I’m not faking it for myself anymore. I want to be healthy! In all aspects of my life which means there is a need for a lot of change. BIG changes! It’s not only got to be an outer body makeover, but an inner body one as well. This reminds me of a quote from one of my favorite movies Definitely Maybe. Ryan Reynolds says, “your shit is a mess” and that’s pretty accurate, my health has been just that because of these surgeries. I just need it to be known that no matter how dark it may seem some days I will come up on top! In the words of Tupac, “You gotta keep yo head up”.
I will. If anyone has ever had a polynidal cyst removed or knows of anyone else who has they know that the healing process is a long one. I myself like to think I’m so hardcore and I may have always just tried to bounce back to quick. If you can suggest or think of any workouts that will not be painful please let me know. I can’t squat or lift heavy things still, but I’m willing to do whatever it takes. Thank you all for reading and I’ll keep writing. I always love to hear what everyone else is thinking so keep your thoughts and ideas coming my way. To leave this on a high note, with all of the ups and downs of the last month I have still managed to lose 12 pounds since I began this project of mine. YAY!!! More to come in the next 24!!!